I'm Naked!!
Well, not me exactly but my poor little cubicle at work! Those of you who don't know me can probably imagine all of the shit I've got around my cubicle....tons of books, my fluffy Valentine from Victor, my Office Space stuff--I had just put up my "Is this Good for the Company?" banner--even my warning sign--You have the right to remain silent, anything you say may be blogged against you. Now it's all in drawers, at least until Saturday. Seems that we are going to be having some office bigwigs visiting til then and so everything has to be "professional" looking. Now, not everyone was at work today to watch our Sup clean up there desks! OMG! I am soooo glad that I'm going to be there when everyone comes in! ROFLMAO! Now, Sam comes back on Tuesday, so that will be kinda interesting (but I'm hoping that she's reading this so she won't be soooo surprised....afterall, she still had her Christmas decorations up!) There was one kid...the same kid that I've been complaining about for a few days ....the one that I wanna slap upside his head...the Sup had to practically wear gloves to clean that nasty boy's desk....ewwwwwwww!! So, I'm gonna be feeling pretty naked the next few days....Okay, I've got to blog about this cuz you all know my feelings about guys who let their pants hang around the middle of their ass...Now, it's pretty bad when it's just another low level peon like me..but a supervisor?? He was bent over someone's desk and I just looked up to see inches of boxers! Ack! My eyes! My eyes! Now, granted, he's lost some weight (looking better and better every week) and I'm always happy to see a fluffy guy...but ....umm....NO! That just ain't right! How can I take someone seriously after I've seen their underwear?!And...I've gotta rag on Ruel cuz he just cracks me up with his imaginary girlfriend and his begging me to get on WoW (yes, I apologize to the Gods of WoW that I have neglected my poor soldier in the ocean but I've got a real life too...well, sometimes!) Anyway, he was wearing these little socks today...I kid you not, those little tennis socks...the only thing they were missing was the fluffy ball on the back! Black ones...with white shower-looking sandals! He kept insisting they were men's socks but they looked pretty girly to me....or maybe it was just him!!Thursday's mail brought an interesting bit of info...a brochure from our Evil Empire (previously known as just The Company) about "Preventing Sexual Harrassment". Preventing? And to send it out in a brochure? What a cop out! Why not put people in groups to read it out loud like every other dumbass piece of garbage and make us sign something like they always do? This way, there's no way to prove who read it and who didn't. You can tell that I did because I try to use everything I get as fodder for this blog. They make it sooooo easy! The biggest printing is the sentence about...if you aren't sure if what you are saying or doing is sexual harrassment, just don't do it. "If you don't know"? If you are that stupid that you don't know, I don't want to be working with you or next to you or around you! If you are stupid enough to ask questions like "Am I sexy or am I hot?".... you kind of deserve the harrassment. Lately there has been someone obsessed with my boobs (okay, who isn't, besides Victor? ROFLMAO) but whenever I walk by him , I gently poke him in the arm to say 'hi'...so does that mean I'm encouraging it? Who knows...he's scaled it back some--no more of the "honking" gestures..so I'm gonna let it go (yeah, I've got this blog as my proof...lol) So, while Smokey the Bear may say,"Only *you* can prevent forest fires." The Evil Empire feels--"Only *you* can prevent sexual harrassment!"....uhmmm...yeah.Okay, well I'm gonna go play some games...OMG ...a new Sims game is out...Sims Freetime..and I haven't bought it!!! Ack!!! Okay, gotta go!
Rules of calling Customer Service!
- 1. Before you call any 800 number--Please put your children, animals & significant others in a closet and lock the door til you're done. We really don't appreciate hearing your children screaming in our ears. We don't, in any way, find their antics nearly as priceless as you do.
- 2. Read your bill before you start bitching and whining about it. Read the front and back of all pages. Read it every single month. No company ever just puts charges on your bill just for thrills or to see how long it will take you to notice. All price increases need to be okayed by the FCC or PUC before they take effect and you are given at least 30 days notice.
- 3. It doesn't matter how long you've gone to school or whether you are a doctor,lawyer or Indian chief, I still know more about your service than you do. I know more about the technology than you do and I've got all day to listen to you as you lose your braincells. (And just so you know, whenver it gets very quiet, you are on mute as we *laaaaauuugghh*, tell our neighbors how stupid you are and wait for you to just....shut up)
- 4. Just about anything a "supervisor" can do, we can do...we just don't want to give it to you. Why should we? Sometimes it just feels better to piss you off.
- 5. Anyone over 60 must take a test before they are allowed to get any sort of electronics. If you can't operate it, you can't have it.
- 6. Please stop asking us how we are ..we really don't care how you are and you make us politely ask you after you ask us. Just start talking and whining about the problem so that we don't have to "mute" you (see previous posts about what happens when you are muted)
- 7. Do *not* eat or chew gum while talking to us. I can understand if you were catching up on lunch while on hold and I'm willing to give a little leeway but you better apologize for it and stop. Do you know how many times I've wanted to tell people that I can't understand them with their mouth full? And to ask them if their mother ever told them that it was just plain rude! I don't chew gum while I'm talking to you...do you consider yourself better than me? You think you are better than *me*?
Doggie Heaven....
Rest in Peace-- my darling Scarlett...17 years together ...from the animal shelter to the end you were one of the sweetest things in my life...8/12/08
3 comments:
A male sup?? Who could it be I wonder?? Hey, are you gonna blog about the sexual harrasment pamphlet we got in the mail?? That crap is just hilarious!! Maybe they should include letting us see their underwear as sexual harrasment?? I mean that's kind of indecent exposure, right?? I hope to see all my stuff when I get there tomorrow, you got me worried now. See you then!
Well, there is it...a nice long paragraph...too bad I threw the brochure away...so I couldn't quote even more classic lines!
Amazing how things just gets better while I'm gone. I got the pamphlet in the mail and grab Dee's ass and said "There, you've been sexual harrased". I plan on SHing him every day when I return to work. Yeah you heard me EVERY DAY!!. On a lighter note, My desk was cleaned. POOR WHOEVER HAD TO DO THAT! I don't know what could of been there to scare supervisor or little children. The countdown begins, 22 hours and counting children.
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